Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Is Lindsay Lohan anorexic or what?



Has anyone seen the recent photos of LiLo? Rumors are flying again that she's battling her eating disorder again (or cocaine) & there was even some sordid story that she & Samantha Ronson are in some twisted self-image competition to see who can be the thinnest. More importantly, I'm still trying to decide whether or not her boobs are real. She seems to be the only chick that manages to drop major poundage & still have large breasts.

To me, that's what inquiring minds really want to know.

Start.Watching.This.Show.Now.


I apologize for my obnoxious use of punctuation in the title, but that's how strongly I feel about this great show. Season 1 was awesome & Season 2 just started so it's not too late to get caught up. Glenn Close kicks a**. It's on Wednesdays @ 10 p.m. on FX. Since nothing else good comes on at that hour, what's your excuse not to watch it?

P.S. - if anyone starts watching this show & loves it, feel free to update me regularly since I don't have DVR & it ends past my bedtime, I frequently fall asleep during the show & miss the ending :).

I can't wait until February 17th


First of all, if you're one of those jerks that hasn't upgraded their tv yet, please do so that I can stop hearing the commercials. However, I doubt that any technologically advanced SoUnpretty readers would be so behind as to still have rabbit ears & an analog tv :). I just want February 17th to arrive so that we can stop seeing the commercials. However, I know that there's going to be some major technical difficulties for people that didn't get the message over the past year (I'm going to include my mom in this group) & we'll continue to see the commercials. Like winter, I give the commercials another six weeks before it's over.

My New Favorite Group: Kings of Leon


So, I first heard of this group at a U2 concert back in '05. They had opened for them & I thought had done a damn good job. I was able to find their stuff on Itunes, but hadn't heard any of their music on the radio. Fast forward almost 4 years later & I can't drive to/from work without hearing at least 1 of their 2 new songs, Use Somebody & Sex on Fire (I'm assuming that "fire" is the good kind of fire, right?).

Anyway, if you haven't heard their music yet, definitely check it out. It's pretty good.

Did you ever have one of those days...


when from the moment you wake up all you can think about is going back to bed in the evening & snuggling under your nice, warm covers to shut out the dreariness of the day? Yeah?
I've been having that kind of day all month.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

It's that time of year again.....


Time for Irish potatoes! My favorite is the homemade kind, but since I don't know anyone who's willing/able to make them for me (*cough* hubby, *cough*), I've had to resort to buying them from the grocery store. Whichever style you prefer, I still think that they're delish.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Welcome to the World, Baby Girl!


My first niece, Nora Elizabeth Burke, is here! And ain't she amazing?

Monday, January 05, 2009

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Purging.


I am packing up my apartment, and these are some of the things I am giving away. Give me a holler if you want 'em:

  • really pretty, brand-new frame from Anthropologie
  • Season One of The OC (the best season)
  • a photo album from Honduras made of all natural materials
  • a mirror made of hammered tin and blue moon tiles
  • a vogue cover

Monday, December 22, 2008

It's our third Christmas together.


...and I still love The Rubes. How can you resist a cat when she nuzzles her head into your hand then falls into a deep sleep? Precious.

Oh my goodness.


I guess it's time for a new timing belt, or so I am told.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Couch for sale.


Please. Pretty please. Someone buy this couch. BEST OFFER.
Craigslist listing is here.

This is what is wrong with America.


Forget the economy, recession, blah blah blah. This is what is wrong with this country: that some market researcher actually decided that this item might sell as a potential Christmas gift -- a battery-operated, singing toy Jeep with a dead deer on the hood. Gross, man, gross.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Chair obsessed.


For the past three nights I have been dreaming about chairs. On Black Friday, instead of going to Best Buy and Radio Shack for super sales, I hit up literally fourteen furniture stores (mostly resale). I have been constantly scouring E-Bay and Craigslist using any combo of the following: danish, danish modern, mid century, vintage, chair, armchair, chaise.

I found two chairs at Uhuru. Two hours and much sweat later, we returned them (for store credit only - boo!) b/c we couldn't get them up the stairs.

Then - eureka! After hitting refresh, refresh, refresh, a new chair appears on Craigslist! And it's awesome! And I call... and the woman says she'll email me the measurements! And all night I dream about the perfect chair! I call all my friends! And the next morning it is SOLD - NOT TO ME! Whaaaa?

But, the danish modern gods were looking out for me because some poor sap's wife din't like how the amazing chair had a little rock to it. So I shlepped in the rain to Hatboro PA and look what I have now:

a most amazing 1963 Danish modern chair in aqua. Love love love.

I may be super particular and annoying, but hey - it's working for me!

Monday, November 24, 2008

The Allure of Dark Nail Polish



Last year, I was late catching onto the trend of dark nail polish. I didn’t realize that I liked it so much until I had a manicure done in about March, at the tail end of the dark nail polish season. However, this year’s going to be different! I’ve already spotted a couple of dark nail polish colors that I like – Revlon’s Vixen & OPI’s Paris collection. If dark nails appeal to you too, check out OPI’s website to pick your fave.

Who the hell does Oprah think she is?


I don’t know if you’ve heard, but apparently, Oprah has decided not to do a “Favorite Things” episode in the traditional sense this year. And by “traditional sense”, I mean when Oprah roles out all of this over-the-top free crap & the audience members lose all of their sense & go completely batshit crazy. Oprah has decided not to do her traditional “Favorite Things” episode in an attempt to sympathize with the everyday consumer & instead offer a show that will show audience members & viewers how to make “heartfelt” gifts from scratch that will cost virtually nothing. I just hope that Oprah’s audience members won’t flip out when they discover that this is not the freebie orgy that they were expecting & storm the stage. Even though, I would think that in today’s economy, Oprah’s show provides just what various retailers need: free advertising so that consumers will spend money. So, in lieu of what’s bound to be a disappointment to both the audience members & viewers, I’ve decided to post a real video that I found of her audience members' reaction & this SNL parody again just for ol’ times sake:http://seriously-jess.blogspot.com/2008/09/oprah-ultimate-parody.html

The Classiest Thing To Do These Days… Request your water in a wine glass

I apologize in advance that this is yet another post on my begrudgingly favorite show, Real Housewives of Atlanta. I noticed on two episodes that NeNe requested water in a wine glass. So, I figured, if the Real Housewives of Atlanta are doing this, this has to be a new trend that us less classy folks have yet to pick up on, right? So, from now on, when you’re at a restaurant or just at a social gathering of some kind, be sure “class” it up a bit by requesting water in a wine glass. Last night at the SoUnpretty book club at host AlltheRage’s house, I made sure to put my own twist on this new trend & take it to the next classiest level – I drank my wine from a water glass!

That’s right, bitches. Be prepared to bring your “A” game when you’re drinking around me.

The Return of the “Real” Real Housewives of the O.C.!


Ok, so I know this is my second post on this show, which means that either I need major help or it’s the Apocalypse. Or both. However, I’m very excited that the bleached blond minxes that started this craziness are coming back for another season. And, there’s a new chick that’s joining them! You can tell that Tamra already has her claws out. This fun starts at on Tuesday, November 25th!

The Bravo network should come with an FCC warning


Last Tuesday while I was home sick , I happened to catch a Real Housewives of Atlanta marathon. At the beginning of this season, my impression of the women were that the French phrase “nouveau riche” couldn’t even begin to describe the tacky, brittle, fell-ass-backwards-into-money parasitic personalities of these women. Just in case you’re not familiar with the cast, here’s the rundown:
NeNe – (pronounced knee-knee, not nay-nay for all you haters), reminds you of the disgusting chick from high school that managed to master her bj skills instead of her reading skills & married some old guy that looks like he’s knocking on death’s door & has money. She’s loud & obnoxious & I think that even her kids hate her.

Kim – reminds you of the trashy chick that you went to high school with whom didn’t discriminate. Every time she’s in the studio with producer Dallas Austin, I keep wondering if she’s going to cheat on her boyfriend, Big Papa, with Dallas. And, she’s only 30! Her wig is totally believable.

DeShawn – the wife of NBA player Eric Snow. Definitely fell ass backwards into money by being his high school sweetheart or something. Says things like “elite society” constantly, which just demonstrates just how low class she really is. Really needs to take a long, hard look at herself & then Kobe Bryant’s wife & see what she can do about developing an eating disorder ASAP.

Lisa – seems nice; however, word on the blogs is that she plays innocent & is just as conniving & catty. Needs to style her hair. Ex-wife of Keith Sweat.

Sheree
- looks like a well-toned, cold, mean tranny. Grew up upper class & now is just “class”. She’s trying to design her own two-bit fashion line, was married to some football player who’s a back-up for the back-up.

Anyway, my distaste for these women has grown into somewhat liking these women. Or, at least somewhat liking one character, in particular, NeNe. Now granted, please don’t take this admission along the lines of I would want her to be my new BFF. Hardly. Instead, the rationale is more along the lines of, “If I had to kill all of these women, I would save NeNe for last”. Now, this sudden like/ newfound sympathy probably came about during my sickness & marathon viewing of the show. Maybe Bravo knows that after repeat exposure, you’re bound to start liking anything. Maybe since I was holed up in the bedroom of my house like some captive, I started to develop that syndrome where you begin to sympathize with your abductor, you know, Stockholm Syndrome. I’m sure that this sudden realization came about due to my teetering on the brink of starvation, insanity & gut-wrenching illness. Regardless, what I’ve just admitted to is very shameful. Now, I’m going to take this no-longer-a secret shame, my Justin Guarini CD & my love of Britney Spears’ Gimme More song go hide under a rock for the rest of my days.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Lesson of the Day: Tights can cause muffin tops


Ever since last winter when I discovered knee-high boots that could fit my chicken calves, I've been sporting tights with them. However, I've recently come to the realization that tights have one major drawback: muffin tops.

Initially, I'm psyched when I put on my tights 'cause of the instant slimming effect. Unfortunately, that positive mojo is immediately flushed away when I see the spillage at the top of my skirt/bottom of shirt. So, until Spanx makes tights that reach as high as my collarbone and/or I successfully develop an eating disorder, consider yourself forewarned as to the drawbacks of tights.

Sigh.