why does ordering a hoagie have to be so stressful at subway? maybe its just me or the locations i have visited, but never in my life have i experienced such anxiety while ordering fast food. when you are at mcdonald's or burger king, order takers barely even look at you and could give a shit if you take all day while selecting from their menus....but at subway, oh no, its a totally different story.
i suspect that all of their counter people are forced to do blow in the back; i mean, thats the only way i can explain their actions. and i think they are timed on how long it takes them to get you the hell out of line or they are forced to eat their weight in bread.
first, the breadbaker shouts out you to select a bread (there's 63 types)-but immediately following that question, demands to know "6 inch or 12 inch?!" in such a sincerely desperate matter that they convince you this is a life or death decision. (and please get your minds out of the gutter RIGHT NOW!)
next, they want to know what type of meat-and don't try to get away with just saying "an italian" because that means nothing to the meat person; they need you to painstakingly break it down to ham, salami, and pepperoni. the most disturbing aspect of this encounter is when they implore you to "double your meat for an extra fitfy cents?" which is subway's version of "would you like to supersize that?" (again, get your filthy mind out of the gutter!)
moving on, and yes, to yet another person in the unecessarily frantic, overmanned sandwich assembly line, is the cheese person. not only are you asked if you want cheese (what a stupid question-don't we all?) but what kind...and then the condiment person starts screaming at you before you even have a chance to finish making all of your previous choices. you will find this part the most frustrating because they will ask you again and again what else you want on your sandwich and you will say you whole shpeal 4-5 times before its all over.
finally you are at the cashier and you think its over, but its not. he/she will push a meal deal on you and you will give in and then there are more decisions to make: chips or cookie? doritos or lays? baked or regular? they are screaming at you like you're on the final obstacle of double dare and you are just as bad because you are screaming back answers and frantically throwing them your money.
uh! now me thinks that Jarod (the subway mascot) didnt lose all that weight from eating at subway; oh no, he was just doing blow with the boys in the back!
2 comments:
i bet you wish you watched them do blow, so you can say you've seen it.
at least they look at you. i can't stand sullen counter people that don't even glance up. like the chick at TJ Maxx the other day who looked at my $20 (not a huge bill) and gave me a full face of attitude, saying "i can't break that." so i got all ones, like a stripper.
that was the filthiest post i ahve ever seen. filled with double entondras. i officially rate this as XXX
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