No, There Ain't No Ticks on Me!

ask yourself when was the last time you really pulled a homer simpson...a complete "DOY!" moment...

well, i can unproudly say i did my big blooper two days ago and today i am still paying for it. i really did it this time. i managed to do one of the stupidest things i could ever imagine doing...i poisoned myself.

yep. poisoned. myself. unintentionally of course.

and i did it celebrating the 3rd birthday of my beloved dog. is this karma telling me that bouncing a dog on your lap, singing happy birthday, smiling for pictures and blowing out candles on a doggie cupcake not a good idea? maybe.

the dog i so proudly bounced on my lap like a baby, also happened to have insect & tic repellent all over her back, which i pressed my face and lips upon numerous times while obnoxiously posing for pictures. my dog hated this, but then again, it was all about me anyway. well, she got mommy back alright for the humiliation she had to endure just to get her yummy birthday cupcake. mommy ingested, inhaled and smeared extremely hazardous chemicals all over her dumb face (and let me admit that i knew that she had this all over her back---because i put it there that morning!).

that night (about six hours of wondering why my face and lips had a tingly, cold feeling) i realized what was the cause and immediately consulted the box of K9 Advantix...."do not touch liquid; if you do, immediately wash your hands with soap and warm water for five minutes. if liquid comes in contact with your clothes, take off clothes immediately and wash them. if liquid comes in contact with your face, wash with warm water for 15-20 minutes IMMEDIATELY and call poison control or your doctor."

hmmm. interesting. this stuff which should have IMMEDIATELY been washed off for 15-20 minutes (about 44 gallons of water), i let simmer on my face and lips for a good six hours. i thought i was going to have a heart attack.

incredibly, i survived. however, i now have a wretched sinus infection which i can't help but wonder could be the aftermath of doing such a stupid thing.

poisoning yourself while celebrating your dog's birthday-so unpretty.