Pen Pal in the Pen

there are many reasons that i could be ashamed of being apart of the female species...especially with representatives like paris hilton, the trashy playboy bunnies on the "girls next door", the nutty mothers on "wife swap", and The View's resident republican, elizabeth hasselback...but recently, petty shame became absolute horror when i heard on GMA that scott peterson actually receives over a hundred love letters a week from adoring women from all over the country.

i guess murdering your pregnant wife so you can have a hassle-free love affair with your girlfriend is just not that big of a deal-surely, he still needs love and affection. and these women who pen him passionate proclamations claim to be just the fuckheads to give it to him.

lets do a quick psychological profile of these freaks, shall we?

they have very healthy sex lives...with their father, father's friends, and their uncles.

they are great supporters of their girlfriends...they always give them a ride to the hospital right after they've had their asses beat by their abusive boyfriends.

they have a strong faith-based upbringing...Reverend Hank personally put jesus inside them.

they take a lot of pride in their appearances...acrylic nails and hot rollers go a long way.

hearing something like this makes me want to cry. are women that desperate? picture what they'd say to justify this: "ok, what scott did was really bad, but he's like, really, really sorry and he told me that if he could, he never ever would have done that...but hey, everything happens for a reason; like, think about it...i never would have met him otherwise..."