Adventures in High Rise Apartment Living, Part II: Sweaty Old Man Balls

Ok, so in addition to Smelly Chick, I have another "gym grievance". There's a disgusting old man ( not really old, probably in his 60s. Just old enough to make me feel like an ageist); that works out in the fitness center at the same time as me, Smelly Chick and Crazy Girl that Sings Out Loud to Herself ( I know, I'm running out of nicknames for these social misfits).

What does he do that pisses me off? Well, first of all, every time I go to the gym on a day when I don't feel like exerting myself ( which is most of the time), this Sweaty Old Man Balls already has his ass parked on the 1 stationary bike that our gym has. Which means, I have to actually work up a sweat on the treadmill or elliptical. So, in addition to this old man slowly pedaling away on the bike, he has this stupid dull look in his eyes that's just aggravating as hell. His gym uniform consists of too short khaki shorts and a button down shirt ( WTF?). With every pedal, I have to watch his shorts inch up perilously close to his "coin purse".

But the really aggravating trait that earns him his nickname is that he NEVER wipes down the bike or any other machine that he touches. The first few times that it happened, I assumed that maybe he just overlooked it. But, after seeing this several times, I decided that this pig just has absolutely no gym etiquette. So, when he's done working out, he wipes his sweaty forehead on the sleeve of his shirt and moves onto the next machine. I'm a slight germaphobe, so all I can think of is his creepy germs on the seat of the bike . One time, I looked pointedly at him as I cleaned off the bike before using it. He just looked back at me with the same dumb look. Jerk.



Sweaty Old Man Balls + No gym etiquette = So Unpretty.