Blaine's Bubble is Finally Popped

ok, i'm a sucker. i totally watched the TWO HOUR david blaine special "drowned alive" last night.

please know that i am not proud. every five minutes i asked myself why the hell was i watching this crap; but i just couldn't help it. i will say that i had no idea that this would drag on for two hours when i tuned in...i thought it was only going to be an hour tops. when 8:55 p.m. rolled around and the show was still exploring his "journey" to being drowned alive, i realized what a trap i had fallen into.

now i was sucked in. i was watching footage of what appeared to be a man trapped in a giant breast implant. then finally the end was near. the finale was to be david holding his breath a record 9 minutes while wiggling out of heavy chains and handcuffs. but, fate had something a little different in mind for the man trapped in the giant breast implant...yes, he got out of the chains, but he was only able to hold his breath for 7 minutes and 8 seconds - not the 9 he promised...and then he had the nerve to cry about it.

its hard to impress someone like me (being as perfect as i am.) and i think i can hold my breath for like-well, i can't hold it for longer than 30 seconds, but thats just because i recently quit smoking...give me 7 years and i'll be kicking blaine's ass!

i want those two hours of my life back please...uh, so unpretty.